Diary of a Madman

Going Against The Grain

Archive for the ‘Life isn’t fair – get fucking used to it’ Category

Friendly Fucking Companies (AKA the hypocrisy of pretense)

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It never ceases to amaze me (well it did until I called one buyer who had the same “I’m too busy to return your calls” message for 3 straight weeks…but that is another story).

Not a day goes by where myself or my partner get told to “fuck off” in no uncertain terms by people we approach as business partners, be it retailers to buy and resell our product or someone we want to talk with in regards to joint marketing initiatives.

I’m not talking about people saying that they are not interested in our product or proposition in a timely manner.  I don’t expect everyone to be into what we are selling.

What I do expect is the occasional return phone call or email saying “Thanks, but no thanks”.  We even leave our email addresses on the voice mails, so they can send us a polite PFO (please fuck off) letter.

It seems that FOAD (Fuck off and die) is the more traditional route taken by people.

But what I typically get is some nasty response, after leaving messages for 4 weeks, along the lines of “Stop calling us already.  We are obviously not interested!!!”  I wonder if any CEO’s or senior managers would care if they knew their low level staff were treating people with such disdain and disrespect.

All that money spent on big consumer ad campaigns destroyed with a phone call.

Beyond the obvious, if “you would have taken 2 seconds to say so 4 weeks ago, I would have stopped calling”, these companies seem to think that I obviously live in some sort of isolation chamber on Mars and don’t know anyone who might actually shop at their stores.

We get these types of responses from both big and small companies.  Virtual and brick and mortar

The majority of these companies put on these fucking smiling happy faces for their customers while treating their suppliers and potential suppliers like absolute shit.  They dont return calls, they fuck them on listing fees, they short pay invoices whenever they feel like it.  Bottom line, they show most of their vendors limited respect.

Guess what, suppliers are people too.  People with money.  And the further I go down this road, there are becoming fewer and fewer retailers I would actually shop.  Which in away is great……more of my money stays with me.

But good work guys…….keep up with those shit eating grins………no one has a clue that its all an act…….no one at all 🙂

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Written by insaneentrepreneur

April 25, 2008 at 6:29 pm

D.O.A.

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We had spent a good part of the last half of 2007 working on a North American distribution deal with a large multinational corporation for our product that got shit canned at the last moment because one of my employees has “legal boo boo” in his background history. I guess our betroth finally got a round to doing some due diligence on the deal and came across this issue.

Given the fact that they were the ones paying us based on the performance of our product and there was no concrete financial commitment involved (If our product didn’t sell, we got zilch, if it did sell, they made a giant risk free margin), I really had trouble figuring out what the issue was. I think if I refused to transact business with anyone and everyone who ever had a legal issue in their past, I would probably be tilling my own land, weaving my own cloth, sewing my own clothes and milking my own cows.

I mean seriously, we weren’t the ones forced to recall a number of our products after they were found to have caused serious bodily harm and death to people, they were. But “we read something on the internet about one of your associates that we arent comfortable with” is somehow grounds to terminate a contract.

Numerous thoughts and emotion ran through my head when I got that call back in January terminating the deal, especially the cowardice on their part involved in dealing with it. The prick that we had been dealing with for close to 6 months didn’t even have the balls to deal with the situation himself, instead pawning it off on one of his underlings – I’ve seen that passing off thing a lot in my dealings with the corporate world.

Since the company we were dealing with was Canadian, I was consider pursuing them on the grounds of some human rights violation. The PR would have been deadly for them. And for a brief moment, I was actually considering flying down to where this joker lived in the bible belt and leaving a flaming bag of dog shit on his porch.

But in the end I realized that I am not in the “causes” business, nor in the “dog shit delivery” business, I’m in the “sell stuff to make money” type of business and filed the experience away in the “Life isn’t fair – get fucking used to it” file, and got on building our own distribution network piece by piece – which is a pain in the fucking ass, but is just part of business.

My revenge is going to come the next time we cross paths (because you know that it always happens) and I’m in the power position. I will crush him – completely.

Written by insaneentrepreneur

April 6, 2008 at 7:37 pm